As someone who teaches professional relationship strategy, it’s natural for me to feel I’ve failed if relationships don’t work out. And it does happen. I can count a number of relationships that have turned sour over the years, some of them with people I previously considered good friends.

I’ve learned, however, to accept that you can’t get on perfectly with everyone. In fact, on reflection, I’ve decided on occasion that I don’t want a relationship with someone if they have done something that goes against the grain for me. If I feel that their values are not a match for mine, I won’t seek to repair a relationship even if that might cost me in one way or another.

Of course, it’s desirable to try to rebuild a damaged relationship more often than not. If you can turn an adversary into an advocate, you can find yourself with a friend for life. But don’t be hard on yourself if not everyone becomes your closest friend. It’s hard to be all things to all people and still stand for something.